“Your spiritual practice will give you many gifts, but don’t expect it to relieve you of your human nature.” So writes Alan Morinis in Everyday Holiness: The Jewish Spiritual Path of Mussar
In the Jewish view, the goal of spiritual life is not to reach an enlightened state in which all the questions and conundrums of life are finally solved, but rather to become much more skilled at the processes of living and to cultivate peace of mind. The Mussar teachers want us to be a calm soul, much like a surfer riding the waves on an even inner keel, regardless of what is happening within and around him. We should be balanced, at peace within, no matter what external whirlwinds we find ourselves in. You acknowledge the ups and downs, but you are calm and aware.
Good. OK. I get that and will strive for that. But I really think some people will have a much more difficult time with this than others might. I came across this list of empath traits, “22 Signs You Are A Highly Sensitive Person,” on live bold & bloom and want to share it with you because I know many of you share these qualities.
I usually know that I’m on a good path when I find synchronicities and coincidences. This article happens to mention Dr. Judith Orloff. I’m currently reading one of her books right now! I’d never even heard of her until Liv Lane mentioned her in one of her newsletters. This list of HSP traits aren’t anything new, but they came up at a time when I’m focusing on Equanimity, which seems to be very tricky when you’re so sensitive to other people’s moods. The book I just finished is Second Sight: An Intuitive Psychiatrist Tells Her Extraordinary Story and Shows You How to Tap Your Own Inner Wisdom
Are you highly creative? Close to animals? Especially vulnerable to sounds? Can you walk into a room and feel the energy right away? Do you avoid crowded places? Require a certain amount of alone time? Are you very sensitive to caffeine/alcohol?
Are you overwhelmed by negativity? Can’t stand the news? I know some people who can have emotional, screaming arguments and then just forget about it and go out to dinner. I don’t understand how!
It’s going to be a real challenge for me to cultivate an inner calm and awareness given these traits. I’m particularly vulnerable here. If you have any suggestions, I’m all ears!
Maybe I will envision a bubble around me during times of stress. Maybe these are tests to help me develop stronger boundaries? How do we balance these disturbing external stimuli with an internal calm?
In this same chapter, Morinis writes that “there is a way of perceiving that includes a kind of shimmering meta-reality that isn’t an aspect of any single thing in sight but encompasses all of it. I can shift into and out of that level of perception.” I’ve got to learn more about that!
Morinis writes about being a witness to your thoughts and emotions, separating yourself from them. That reminds me of what Michael Singer advises in The Untethered Soul: The Journey Beyond Yourself
is sitting right here waiting for me to open it. Eeek!!) Anyway, Morinis describes “an intangible and luminous presence that radiates into all. It is the job of the witness to keep an eye out for that light. When you realize that, and assign this task to your inner witness, and strengthen this practice, then over time the witness will make you more aware of the radiance that is a constant in the ever-shifting contexts in which you live.”
It’s the way of Mussar to practice. Practice, practice, practice until something becomes a way of life. I’ve got a lot of work to do! I’m much better at it now that I’m a parent, but I still have a ways to go.
Tell me how you cope with external chaos and remain calm.
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