I have so often felt overwhelmed, out of balance, with thousands of thoughts running through my mind each day. I felt this past year or two as if I were a stalk of wheat, blowing this way and that in the wind, responding to each new burst of air.
When I am eventually reminded of my true self and feel like I am centered again, I wonder how I could hold on to that fleeting experience and feel that way more often.
In this new year, I aim to learn how to come back to center and get really good at it. It’s a new field for me.
Awareness is always the best place to start, I think, and so I’m been inviting awareness to show me where my tension is, what my patterns are, how I stress myself out. I think there are different mindsets that I vacillate through. If I am feeling centered, no to-do list or chaotic environment can throw me off track. So how do I find and stay with that centered mindset?
I want to feel grounded more often, allow more fun and laughter, seek appreciation and awe. Things that help me feel that way are landscape photography, reading and poetry, and art.
So slowing down… dialing life down a notch. How could I do that? For me, I think it means trusting that there’s a magical foundation helping me keep my ideas and projects in order.
I was reading a course description by Stephanie Bennett Vogt about simplifying and clearing barriers to get to your best life. She suggests 5 ‘S’s:’ slow down, simplify, sense, surrender, and self-care.
If I can let go of the need to control something and start to believe that my life will still work if I focus on one thing at a time, that everything will still be whole and functional until I can get back to it, I would enjoy letting my thoughts slow down. I would let myself pet the cat, breathe in the cool outside air for a moment, or enjoy a cup of tea. I hope that my racing thoughts and my sense that I have so much to accomplish would ease.
One thing at a time.
I am beginning by creating a little space in my office with my favorite objects, those that bring a sense of calm to me. I am printing my favorite photos to keep around me too… the ones that make me smile. This will be a springboard for feeling nourished, quiet, and centered.
I’ve been struggling lately with making myself go to “self-care appointments” that I’ve set for myself. I’ll make an appointment for a manicure, for example, and then really not want to go. Either I don’t feel like interacting with people or I am enjoying what I’m doing and don’t feel like changing course. There have been many last-minute cancellations lately.
This has happened so much that I’ve decided to cancel my stretch class membership, my personal trainer, and my drum lessons and to stop making appointments for other things. I have been so structured and over-scheduled for so long that I want some time where I don’t have many things on the calendar, even pleasurable things. I’m giving that to myself… no judgement.
Another activity-inducing thing has been buying things for the new house. That entails time on websites, unboxing, recycling boxes, etc. It sometimes entails reboxing returns and trips to shipping places. So many purchases, so much activity. I am done with that!
I’m craving stillness and quiet and order. I am making a main list of what I want to spend my time on in the next few months.
- Reading: I have not been able to spend nearly as much time reading as I’d like due to the house build. I have a long list/stack of parenting, spirituality, and fiction books to dive into.
- Studying: Though I am still in the Mussar facilitator certification program and am leading my own group, we are nearing completion. I have enrolled in a new online class that spans January to June to study a classic text.
- Photography: Before the madness of the last couple of years, I was taking an online course about the Canon Mark IV, my camera. I want to finish the course and use my camera much more. I also want to learn how to batch edit in Lightroom. The people who have seen my photos in our house have asked me if I sell them, so I may do that again.
- Art: I have a few people who have asked for a large custom piece similar to the one I made last summer. I aim to get my art room unpacked and organized and start creating! I have something in mind to make for our guest room too. I may refocus on my Etsy shop too.
- Writing: I have missed this space so much the last few months! I feel infinitely better now writing this post than I did when I first sat down to begin.
- Being: I enjoy looking at our backyard. It looks like a mini oasis to me. And yet… I focus on the weeding to be done, the leaves to bag, the pool to clean instead of simply enjoying the space. I am going to spend more time outside.
- Making space for the new: I gravitate toward new ideas, fun projects, researching travel, starting a new hobby. Who knows what the year will bring?!
There will still be trips to the grocery store, haircuts, house appointments to keep as we work through our punch list, but life in general will be much less chaotic. Now that we are home (yay!), there is less time spent coming and going, fewer lists to make, and much less to worry about. I am unsubscribing to emails and newsletters like crazy. 🙂
My mind is enjoying the slowdown, even if it’s a bit cautious about it in case there’s something I’m missing.
Tell me, what are you focusing on in this new year? How do you find peace of mind?
