I’d like to recommend a webinar called “Goodbye Busy: 3 Ways to Reconnect with What Matters Most” with Courtney Carver of Be More with Less and Joel Zaslofsky. It’s about:
- how feeling busy makes us act busy and what to do instead
- how to end the endless game of catching up
- how to stop feeling busy all the time
- changing the cultural narrative of busyness and breaking the link between time and money
It’s ironic, but this webinar replay sat in my email for a month until I set aside time to watch it. I’d missed the live version, but obviously wanted to hear some answers because I signed up for the webcast. But doing so many things and living regular everyday life, including needing to run to the store and laundry and bill paying and blogging and Weight Watchers meetings and birthday parties and on and on…, kept getting done first.
People seem to say quite often that they are so busy. It’s tiring to hear every single person say this, and I’m sure they are busy, but it’s as if we must be busy to be successful. However, Courtney says intentionally reminding herself to pull back is part of how she successfully balances what’s important to her. Doing less and doing it well seems a far better contribution. What exactly are we trying to prove??? Relevance? Worth?
Joel reminded me that it used to be a sign of prosperity to have leisure time. Now, it’s quite the opposite, it seems. I’ve known a few people now who have left a corporate job in favor of a non-profit one in order to have the time to spend with friends and family and on things that are close to their heart. The endless race would otherwise not have ended, and it’s admirable to pause, look around, and ask ourselves what’s most important.
Rather than try to summarize the entire webcast for you here, I highly encourage you to watch or listen to it sometime. Also recommended: Courtney’s blog post called “How to end the endless game of catching up” all about sleep, entertainment, e-mail, FOMO, and being present. In it Courtney writes, “It will all get done, or it won’t. Either way, you will be ok.”
You already know that I do a lot and I will probably always have the tendency to want to. But… I’ve started allowing only 3 major tasks in a day. It has really allowed me the time to spend on slowing down and tuning in, which is so important to me. I may end up with only 15 minutes to catch up with a friend or read a book, but I need that time and value it. I’m more patient and kind because I’m not racing around all day (just most of it).
The hard part is having to say no to something or rearrange my schedule to shift something to a different day, but I’m doing pretty well with it. Someone I value wants to meet for lunch? I schedule it for a day when there’s no meetings, appointments, or already scheduled classes. The other 2 items will usually fill themselves in. Watching this webinar and writing this post is one of my three for today!
I must recommend this Brave Girls email that I’ve flagged and read quite often:
Let me know your thoughts! I’m interested in how you might consciously slow down. Do you meditate? Intentionally schedule fewer tasks in a day? Do tell. 🙂
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This is a badge I got rid of a long time ago. Many years ago I attended a conference where a man from another culture said something about “us Americans” and how we always say we are so busy, too busy, etc. Then he said…busy is just another word for lazy and we use busyness to avoid what’s really important…what we really need to focus on. Regardless of how someone feels about the term busy or lazy and how they relate, I definitely know people who run, run, run and it keeps them from connecting to their feelings…to what isn’t working in their life…not that it happens with everyone. Anyway, I avoid busy at all costs and know that I am a better person, I am more productive, and I am happier when I take time to play so I’m going to keep doing more of that 🙂
The connection between those two words struck me. I try very hard not to be lazy… I must have a strong aversion to it and think of it as a weakness. I agree that tuning in helps us be happier. Thank you for your comment!
Great point, saying that we are busy, might make us feel like we are being productive. However, I don’t think we are being productive if we are constantly so busy. what are we doing that we are not completing something to have free time lol.
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In the last ten minutes, I have raced around doing a lot of things, and I think it was productive. Maybe I work to deadlines? I’ve got to leave the house, but wanted to fold laundry, start a new load, take out the trash and recycling, hang up some shirts, stack up some library books, put boxes to be recycled in my trunk, and probably something I’m forgetting. Lol. But now that all that’s done, I feel that I’ll be able to focus on the two evening meetings I have. Am I crazy? Probably. And all the while, I’m jotting things to do on my calendar for tomorrow. 🙂
Such a great point here! For me, the most important consequence of over-scheduling is poor sleep. Sleeping poorly makes everything else harder the next day, makes me unhappy, unproductive and it’s bad for my health. I was struck by the visual contrast between SimpleREV and Brave Girls. I relate better to the artistry of Brave Girls, but that’s a matter of individual taste.
Oh my goodness YES! My perspective is totally skewed when I’m low on sleep. When I was new to motherhood, I thought I had Post Pardum Depression and sought out a psychiatrist… turns out 5 hours a night of sleep can do that to anyone. 🙂 Self care is a priority for me for sure, and this is one of the biggest ways I give it to myself. Thanks for writing!