I LOVE this FREE e-book from Hannah Marcotti called Making Space: Letters from me to you. It consists of 22 letters about finding a few minutes of peace in a busy life, about making space for joy, passion, quiet… for you.
I planned to read one each day, but I have to admit that I read them all at once because I couldn’t stop!
If you need some gentle permission to focus on yourself for 2 minutes, check out this little gem.
I can’t say that I’d ever given this common roadkill much thought before last week, when my daughter and I went to the Houston Arboretum’s weekly Tyke Hike. I got as much pleasure as I could from being outside in the humid 86-degree weather (are you quite sure it’s really November?) with 20 toddlers and their caregivers. It was fun to learn some facts about armadillos though!
(This one is plastic, don’t worry.)
My daughter was right in telling me that it’s not nice to say, but I still can’t get over just how ugly these guys are! Even the little babies. Sigh. Sorry to any armadillo lovers out there.
Actual armadillo hideout
Pretending to be little armadillos/foraging for insects
I highly recommend checking this place out. 155 acres (5 miles of walking trails) in the middle of Houston is really something. I can’t believe I’d never been before last week. After our “hike,” my daughter and I played in the Discovery Room for over an hour, playing with puzzles and manipulatives to learn about frogs, butterflies, and animals.
I notice that I am entering the winter holiday season dragging my feet. I am going to need to seriously motivate myself (and soon!) to prepare a Thanksgiving meal for 19 and open our home for the festivities. Christmas decorations have already overtaken aisles and aisles in the craft stores I frequent, some of which must never have gotten the memo that some people celebrate other holidays.
It’s challenging to remember that these times are not about the stuff – the decorations and gifts and logistics. We need to focus on the people in our lives and those out there who are not as fortunate as we are or who may need some thing or some money or some love. My biggest gripe with this season of craziness is: “why do we only do these things now? why not do this all year round???”
Joanna from The Receiving Project recently blogged about 42 Ways to Be of Service. I’ve pasted them below for you as well so you can explore the links. Some of these are surprisingly simple to do – it’s really just a matter of being aware of other people while you’re going about your day. So many times I find I am heads down, focused on the task at hand or whatever is on my to-do list, dashing from one to the other without looking up to even notice other shoppers, let alone help them.
A couple weeks ago, I ran into the grocery store for one thing between dropping my daughter off at preschool and running home to meet a repairman. I almost didn’t have the time or patience for the older woman who needed to ask me about whether she should turn her heat on in her house. (It was 50 degrees here for 10 minutes and people do tend to freak out about that.) The main mitzvah here was in listening to her with respect for a couple minutes before dashing away. I reminded myself that one’s attention is often the greatest gift you can give. With a smile and a shoulder pat, I was off, and she was smiling. (And the next day it was 84 degrees. Wait… it’s still 84 degrees. Where the heck is fall?)
It seems like such a silly thing, giving and receiving holiday cards, but I just love devoting a wall or a door to all the pictures and cards we get during the month of December. Looking at it gives me a charge every time I pass it, reminding me of all the love in our lives.
After spending a lot of time writing the message that I printed on the back of each of our holiday cards last year (as in fed each and every one through our little printer), I decided that I wasn’t going to devote much time to this project for 2011.
So I ordered this year’s cards the other night after viewing only a handful of sites and options. I spent maybe 45 minutes perfecting the card’s message and the font size and type. Then another couple hours selecting a picture. (Don’t get me started.) Our mailing list only needed a little tweaking since we have only met a handful of new friends this past year and not too many people have moved.
I was proud of myself that this is not going to be a time-consuming project for me, but then I got to thinking…
How special would it be if I could write a small handwritten note on each one just for that person, touching on something we have in common and wishing them well? I mean, we are sending them a card because we care about them, not because we want to brag about our family. It’s a simple opportunity to make sure that these people know how much they mean to us and how much we value our friends and family.
I’m going to work on them gradually throughout this month. I do want to mail them all out at the beginning of December because most of our friends probably don’t have our new address and I want to make sure we receive their cards. I am looking forward to this project because it’s a powerful and enriching way to maintain connections.
All images shot with my 50mm compact macro.
I never thought it would be possible to say, but I am enjoying my sweet daughter more these days. Over the summer, I reached a point of boredom and frustration and probably needed a break, but a break was not coming. Too much togetherness, you know? All day, every day is just too much. I felt like I was by myself in the trenches and I didn’t know how to persevere. I knew enough by this point to know that nothing lasts forever, so I just kept clocking one hour after another and waiting for bedtime or for my dear hubby to get home from work. In short, I felt like a terrible mother because I didn’t want to play with my daughter. I was sick of it.
I knew I needed help so we had a couple of babysitters come regularly, one on one afternoon for a few hours, the other on a different day. I got to have some breathing room and be by myself. It was so nice, except I squandered it sometimes by using it for grocery shopping or other errand running. Much of it was taken up by our new house.
My daughter started preschool and so now I have two and a half hours to myself, three mornings a week. Two months in, it finally feels like two and a half hours rather than 10 minutes. I am using it to catch up with myself and with friends and not to run errands or unpack boxes.
The greatest change is that my parents have offered to take care of my little lady one day and night each week. This is HUGE! 24 hours all for my own self! Already this has strengthened my relationship with my husband. Since we have more than 3 minutes to sit and have dinner on that night, we linger and laugh and catch up. This time is helping me relax since I don’t have to leap out of bed in the morning at my daughter’s beckon. I can do my absolute favorite thing, which is to have coffee and read in bed… for as long as I like. And even better, I have guaranteed times that I can plan to go to the dentist, get my hair cut, get my car inspected. You know, just normal life things that were almost impossible before.
The first recent time my daughter was gone overnight, I desperately tried to accomplish so many things that I was more exhausted when I went to pick her up than I was when I dropped her off. I wasn’t happy to see her and I was craving more time for myself. So now I just do one or two things and relax the rest of the time. Last week I even soaked in a warm bath. At some point, I start missing my baby and looking forward to seeing her again. This feeling of rejuvenation lasts for days! I have patience and creative ideas that weren’t there before.
Yesterday I spent all day with my daughter and realized multiple times that I was having the best time. We were laughing and remembering funny things. She was cracking me up. I was making her laugh too. She was telling me stories from school. We went to music class and then, since it was raining, we wandered the mall and spent a l o n g time sipping smoothies and watching people ice skate (I’m talking 2 hours people – long!). She didn’t nap, but it was an enjoyable afternoon of finger painting and other art projects. I wasn’t reaching for my phone every two minutes for an escape. We made up songs, had snacks, watched a couple of Olivia episodes. I kept telling her how much fun I was having (because she was listening, she was not whining, she was walking on her own two feet, etc. – got to reinforce these good behaviors!) and she said she was too. I honestly do not think I would be appreciating her so much if I didn’t have these breaks – from school and from my mom.
School and time away is giving my daughter a broader range of experience and also some much-needed confidence and independence. All stay-at-home parents need a little support and time to ourselves to get through these long days with our little ones. I didn’t know how much I needed it! I encourage everyone to ask for help and then to accept it when it’s offered.
