On being connected 24/7

Naomi

iphone

On Friday morning, on my way to turn on the shower, I dropped my iPhone in the toilet. I’m just smart like that.

Panic rose up from somewhere deep within and I started seriously freaking out.  I had two appointments that morning and now I couldn’t call them to say that I’d be late.  I was expecting our roof repair guy at the house too.  I had no idea what tasks were needing to be done because they are all on my phone calendar.  Should my daughter’s school need to reach me in an emergency, I was also out of luck.  We don’t have a home phone.

I got in the car and headed to the closest Apple store.  The tire replacement light was on in my car, which made me wonder: is there something universal that I am supposed to be knowing or changing about my life? Am I meant to learn to do less in a day? To show humility somehow that I have far less control than I ever realized?

I use my phone all day long.  I wake up to the phone’s alarm, then check the weather, my calendar, and e-mail.  Other things that are on my phone that I missed in the few hours I didn’t have it: directions and maps, store hours, to-do lists, photos taken since I’ve backed up the phone, the Instagram community, my podcasts and music and audiobooks.  But honestly, I was shocked at how dependent I am on this little rectangle.  The panicky feeling was awful!

I guess my phone is the one thing that I always have with me and it’s become an appendage that I rely on.  I’m not sure what to do about that.  I use all my apps to deposit checks, make shopping lists, pull up store coupons, communicate in other languages, even have food delivered.  It’s not “just a phone” and it’s not just for social media.

Perhaps we as a society need a backup plan? Being out of the house and away from any sense of connectivity left me feeling like I was in a state of emergency, in an alternate world and away from my comfort zone.  The feeling didn’t go away once I had a new phone.  We have so much wrapped up into a little electronic device and we don’t even understand how it works.

I suppose I’ll try to get into a habit of backing it up every day and possibly go back to using paper lists… what do you guys think?

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27 responses

  1. Amy Putkonen

    You might want to open it up and dry it with a paper towel first. If you are not sure how to open it, check online. I am sure that there is a blog post about that somewhere.

    Reply
  2. Amy Putkonen

    Hi Naomi,

    If you haven’t tried this yet, stick your phone in a big bowl of rice and just leave it for a couple of days. In multiple cases, I have had people report that this fixes it. Good luck with your offline adventures!

    Reply
  3. Linda Watson

    I’d not like having my phone at hand, mainly because, like you, we don’t have a landline. Irony of that is that I hardly ever use it as a phone, more apt to communicate via text or FB. But, when we did have a landline, I felt that same anxiety when it went out, which it did frequently. It gives me some security knowing it’s there for an emergency. Beyond that, I enjoy my smartphone — I love taking photos with it, having all of my lists in one place and handy and quick access to “paper” if I want to sketch an idea or catch some particular color combination. I also use sketchbooks and journals, but they don’t fit in my levis hip pocket as easily. 🙂

    Reply
    1. Naomi

      Me too. Me too! The portability is genius.

      Reply
  4. PR Brady

    Being an avid outdoorsperson, I really do try to make sure I live off the grid as much as possible regarding technology. Partly because I have to be able to do what I do without it, but mostly because I don’t like what technology is doing to all of us–you know, how we communicate, our interpersonal communications. So, I saw a very interesting video. I reposted it on FB a while back, and had put this comment with it….
    I don’t have a smart phone.
    I often make phone calls to reach people.
    I leave voice mail messages.
    I don’t text unless it’s my only option.
    I use a laptop and email.
    I go for days without looking at technology to see what’s going on.
    I am there 100% for conversations.
    I don’t expect to be changing things any time soon, either.
    What about you?
    Check out this video!
    And think about it.
    Here’s the link:
    http://www.littlethings.com/a-video-everyone-needs-to-see/
    What struck me was that it was created by younger people–there is hope after all! 😉

    Reply
    1. Naomi

      Wow, that’s really interesting! My grandma, who calls weekly, is about the only person I talk to on the phone. I asked a bunch of fellow INFJ’s if they have the same issue (asked on Facebook, of course!) and it appears to be a common thread with introverts. I get immersed in thoughts and also sometimes just feel yucky and I don’t want to talk to a soul, even myself. Most days, I’m happy to engage with people in real life but still I don’t answer the phone.

      The video… I also have a thing about watching videos I guess! I don’t want to give it the 4 minutes it’s asking of me. I totally get the point of it though. I hate seeing families were everyone is on some sort of device. I must say though that I communicate far better in writing, so sometimes I write out my feelings in an email to my husband and THEN we can talk face to face.

      I appreciate all your comments here!

      Reply
  5. Michele Bergh

    We are so attached to our phones – it’s kind of crazy. I forget mine now and again and no longer feel that sense of panic in most cases. If I needed directions or a phone number, that might get a different response, but in general I don’t mind being disconnected for a little while. My calendar, my emails, etc. are backed up and available on my computer. I have a house phone because it was basically free with our package so I have other resources. I am in the middle of a lot of purging…maybe that helps me be okay with disconnecting some…I feel like that’s what I need right now.

    Reply
    1. Naomi

      Well all my stuff is now backed up for sure! Smart of you! I did such a huge purging when we were doing the Soul Space book and now I think I need to do it again in some rooms. 🙂

      Reply
  6. Tat

    I don’t use my phone nearly as much as most people… I still have my paper planner and I use paper a lot to write things down. Having an old iPhone probably helps… if I start using it all the time, it would run out of battery. And I still have to be very conscious about it and constantly remind myself, ‘I’m playing with my kids now, email can wait’ or ‘I really wanted to finish this book, why I am getting distracted?’

    Reply
    1. Naomi

      You’re so right, Tat. Our own mental filters are the most reliable if we want to change. Thanks for your comment.

      Reply
  7. Andrea

    I can totally relate. I’m secretly admitting to myself that I might be a phoneaholic lately. My husband made me stop having my phone at the table when we eat lunch together at work and it’s so hard! I have to leave it in my office to stay off of it. Lol

    Reply
    1. Naomi

      I feel you, Andrea. Thanks for commenting!

      Reply
  8. Deborah Weber

    I’m here, often feeling like a lone voice in the wildness, to say it’s perfectly possible to live a productive, happy life without being plugged in 24/7. Technology is incredibly useful and I’m not a Luddite, but I truly believe one of the reasons I have healthy boundries and a serene attitude is that I’m NOT constantly plugged in.

    Reply
    1. Naomi

      It’s definitely possible. Just this morning our internet was out, and I read a book. Wonder of wonders! 🙂

      Reply
  9. Lissa A Forbes

    I understand this completely. I swear I have my hand on my phone for some reason or another all day. I recently backpacked 156 miles (Denver to Leadville) of the 485 mile Colorado trail (Denver to Durango). For a good portion of the trip I was unable to communicate due to lack of cell service, but I still used it excessively … for navigation and camera. I don’t know what I’d do without that rectangle. I remember a couple years ago when I was switching service, I was out-of-pocket for a full day and had that same sense of panic–what if someone was trying to reach me? I don’t have any answers. I will probably continue my dependency and feel like a limb has been severed if something goes wrong with the little white rectangle. Thanks for sharing your experience in this realm.

    Reply
    1. Naomi

      I enjoyed reading your comment, Lissa! Being out in the wilderness like that must have been refreshing. I don’t think I would want any music or podcasts there. Cell service would be nice though!

      Reply
  10. kimberly

    I often need time away from my phone and computer, preferably in nature. For me, its about acting instead of reacting. And also about knowing that its only been a couple of decades in all of human history that we are so relentlessly available to each other. I need to break away from that. For me, I need to know that I’ll be fine regardless. But yes, its difficult. I’m glad you’ve addressed it.

    Reply
    1. Naomi

      I agree with you on time in nature. Closing my eyes and just being for a few minutes is important to me too. It’s funny you wrote about how recent all the changes are because I was just writing a post on kids and materialism… and saying something very similar. Every generation,I think, has that experience about the ones that follow.

      Reply
  11. Susanna Gross

    It’s quite a modern addiction, the smartphone. I agree with Cheryl, moderation in everything is a good idea. I still have a land line in town, where you can get them, but I don’t urge you to order that service. I admit I have my land line mainly for the DSL. Maybe your best communications backup would be to pick up a TracFone at the supermarket for $20. You can even get a low-end Android smart phone if you want to spend a little bit more. Toss that in the glove compartment with an activation card and you are covered for various emergencies. I realize it wouldn’t have you calendar on it. I would rely on a cloud backup for that one. I don’t think I would panic if my phone died, but I would feel almost as bad if my laptop did. I try to protect myself from that by automatically backing up to my server at teatime each afternoon, network permitting. I am used to doing without connectivity when we go backpacking. That’s good for my emotional health in more ways than one.

    Reply
    1. Naomi

      It’s so funny you write this about the backups because I am backing up my photos right now! I’ve gotten a few months behind and I have a reminder on my calendar to do it on the last day of the month. Photos and videos of my daughter, photography, blog posts, and travel… takes me a few hours! The peace of mind is worth it. I have a Passport hard drive and one on the server at home. Double insurance.

      Reply
  12. Cheryl

    I think you should put Station Eleven on your book list…and I think, moderation in everything is good…so maybe think about a landline again…I bugged my kids until they both got one again…for emergency purposes..and so that if they get in bind like yours, they are not never alone..LOL
    I just never think it’s a great thing to be to dependant on one thing or one person…
    I do love reading your post though and I’m hoping your doing it on a computer and not your phone…
    So just for that one day….you were in the toilet. I bet your back up and running like crazy now….xoxo

    Reply
    1. Naomi

      Woah, that looks like an amazing read. Have you read it already? I just requested it at the library.
      Yes, I wonder about a landline too. Mr. B said they don’t often have that option anymore, but at least they sell something digital that allows an extra phone line for emergencies (unless the internet goes down…).
      Yes, I always write on my computer. I don’t really enjoy writing on my phone, even emails.
      I’m trying to slow down, really I am. In fact, I just watched a webinar all about stopping the insane busyness. 🙂

      Reply
  13. janet

    I’m in the same boat, and have ZERO advice. Something happens to my phone? I’m screwed. I do have paper back-up for my calendar, though. I have 4 kids (and their parents) activities, plus myself to track, and I finally found a planner that will handle it all, so lug it around with me. Come to think of it, it has a place for contact info, so I probably ought to transfer addresses into it, too, but every year? What a pain. Anyway. Ya ain’t alone sistah!

    Reply
    1. Naomi

      I just ordered something too that looks promising. I do like seeing my week on a piece of paper so I can balance errands with to-dos with appointments!

      Reply
  14. Aunt Val

    I started keeping my cell phone in my right back pocket and now my right hip is killing me with pain at a 7 level. Hhmmmm? Don’t get me wrong, I like having all this information at the touch of a fingertip as much as you, but I still worry that by 2020, the Health Powers That Be will tell us that 4G and WiFi (not to mention microwaves) are what’s killing the planet and everything on it.
    My advice: keep as little personal information on that rectangle as possible outside of your house. And keep paper (that’s right, I said the P word) copies at home in a metal lock box or filing cabinet and don’t drop the key in the toilet!

    Reply
  15. Paula

    I know what you mean. I left my phone home one day and felt so lost. I’ve been thinking about this lately. Do you realize how much stress we put on ourselves with countless texts and apps? It’s like having a dozen conversations at once. But when I think about turning it off I panic too. What if my daughter can’t reach me? What if …?

    Something needs to change for me at least. I welcome ideas.

    Oh and I am typing this in bed barely awake, having read your email:). Just sayin’

    Reply
    1. Naomi

      So so true. Living at a frantic pace does seem wrong. It’s also that “fear of missing out” that makes me want to read every email and see every FB post. Sigh.

      Reply

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